On the one hand, the love and support of your significant other, immediate family, and close friends are important to your success in the scary new venture of investing in real estate. On the other hand, if you let the negativity of your acquaintances and colleagues discourage you-or if you make the common mistake of letting them get too far into your business dealings-you'll have a very hard time reaching your real estate goals.

In my real estate seminars, I often see couples where one member is significantly more hesitant to take the leap of actually buying properties than the other. It tends to be the case that the more conservative and frightened of the pair actually controls the dynamic-no properties ever get purchased, because the determined member of the relationship bows to the fears of the scared member in order to keep the peace. An important step in overcoming the fears of your spouse or significant other is simply to make sure that he or she has all of the information that you do. Taking your partner to workshops, conferences, and seminars that you're attending lets him (or her) get the education he needs to feel comfortable with what you want to do. Including him in meetings with your mentor, lender, agent, attorney, and so on allows him to ask the questions that are preying on his mind directly, rather than having them filtered through you. And sitting down to really explain the dynamics of a deal you'd like to buy-in excruciating detail, if necessary-can help to take the emotion out of the idea of committing to tens of thousands in debt, and make him comfortable with the idea that it's a GOOD thing, not a bad thing.

But be aware: even when you've secured the support of your significant other, you WILL have to deal with the discouraging words and advice of your friends and colleagues. For some reason-and this is a universal experience among new real estate investors-everyone you know will be anxious to tell you that real estate isn't a good investment, that you can't do it, that you're crazy to try, and that their Uncle Joe died destitute after buying one bad deal.

Among experienced investors, there are a lot of theories about why this phenomena is so widespread. One theory goes that our friends and acquaintances are secretly jealous when we take steps to better our lives; another is that they are so brainwashed into thinking that a salaried job is the be-all and end-all of success that they're honestly worried about protecting us from losing it; another is that our loved ones are afraid that when we become multi-millionaires, we won't have time for them any more.

Whatever the cause, the solution is simple: know that it's going to happen, shrug it off (what's someone who only aspires to retire on social security doing giving you financial advice anyway?), and spend as much time as possible around successful investors who are already doing what you want to do, and who will encourage you every step of the way.
One other warning about friends and family: don't bring them into your business without a great deal of forethought and legal documentation. I know of a brother and a sister who haven't spoken for 2 years because of a real estate partnership gone bad; two college roommates who ended their friendship in court, when one evicted the other; and dozens of other situations where formerly close relationships have cooled or ended because the parties have gotten into real estate together, and have later regretted it.

Whatever the details of the situation, the root cause is always the same: you and your friend go into the deal with different expectations, but you both think that the other knows what's going on. For instance, you might have the deal-making experience and the money, and you know that your brother is a great renovator. You figure that he knows that getting the deal you've bought together is top priority; he thinks you understand that he has to take the more profitable jobs first. Your money sits in your deal for months while he works on other people's houses. You get mad; he gets defensive. Next thing you know, Thanksgiving dinner is an uncomfortable ordeal for everyone involved.

As in any business, getting involved in real estate with people you know is risky. Never, never place someone you care about in the position of costing you money unless your agreement is outlined in writing. And be sure to include "worst case scenario" agreements that specify how the property will be disposed of if one or both parties decide it's too much work, or not enough profit, or just too stressful to deal with.

Source: www.regoddess.com

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